I'm never satisfied, or so it would seem

You may think that the lack of posting over the last couple of weeks is due to reasons of romance. Perhaps you have a mental picture of BN2 and me skipping hand in hand in slow motion through a field of daisies, possibly while The Turtles' 'So Happy Together' plays in the background.

Sorry to burst your conceptual bubble, but no. We're still dating, but I've been finding the pace of things a little too fast and I've been prodding the brakes. BN2 is a spontaneous, impulsive kind of guy, and if we were moving at his pace we'd have met each other's parents and be picking out china patterns for our bridal registery by now. Not because we're made for each other, but I think we both feel the need to have a lover beside us. I just see it because I'm a more cautious and analytical person than he is.

While I like BN2 and find him reasonably attractive, he's not The One. I'm prepared to keep seeing him in case he becomes The One, but I'm already fairly sure that he won't.

This was brought home to me on Saturday night, when I was hanging out at my place with some friends, including this guy. At one point he was in the kitchen making himself a snack while I lounged on the couch, watching him prepare the food, and I had a sudden daydream about what life together would be like... just the ordinary domestic routines given significance by doing them with a man you love. Not that I love my snack-making friend, but I think I could if he was a) not straight and b) reciprocated.

I don't think the same about BN2, sadly. We'll just have to see what happens.