Get it or get out

One interesting thing I've noticed, as homosexuality becomes more and more mainstream, is that almost all straight people still don't "get" it. Whether they're on the conservative or progressive end of the spctrum, or somewhere in between, they still don't understand what it is to be gay.

After years of being told "you don't choose homosexuality; it chooses you", only a few people still admit to thinking that it's a lifestyle choice. However, there's a certain disconnect between what they're told and what their hearts tell them. You can tell them "it's not something gay men choose" until you're blue in the face, and they'll accept that as a logical proposition, but deep inside there's a little voice that says, "okay, so they don't think they have a choice in the matter, but really, it can't be quite like that."

I've met otherwise intelligent, thoughtful, wise people who just can't shake off the idea that a gay man could go straight if only the right incentive could be discovered. They don't say it out loud, and they couch it in acceptable terms, but you can tell that under the surface they're clinging to some sort of free will escape clause. They believe, even if they don't admit it, that there must be some way your could reframe your life and/or your worldview to suddenly become attracted to women.

I think it all comes down to something I mentioned a few posts ago: straight people simply can't empathise with gay people, because the idea of wanting to have sex solely with your own gender, to the complete exclusion of the opposite gender, is just too alien to their own drives.