The power and perks of popularity

Something very strange has happened, and I have no idea what's going on. I'm suddenly, inexplicably and intensely popular with gay men.

I'm inclined to blame my new iPhone, a superceded model that KCG gave me when he upgraded to the new one. It's battered and scratched, with a crack in the rear panel and a woeful battery life. However it's spent two years absorbing KCG's charisma and dating mojo into its curcuitry, and now it seems to be reflecting it back. I've never been so popular in my entire life.

It probably also has something to do with the fact that earlier this year I joined Scruff, a mobile dating app that's like a more beary, less twinky version of Grindr. As I am more beary and less twinky myself, it seems to be a good fit with me. Five of my seven dates in my now infamous Week of Dates came from Scruff; it's hard to argue with those numbers.

Speaking of the Week of Dates, I've kept up with Mr Tuesday and Mr Wednesday, although there's a lack of fire there that's kept me from sleeping with either of them. However, having them in my life has given me an excuse to nudge UAM out of my life, much to my relief and to his displeasure.

A funny thing happened on my third "date" with UAM. Instead of just fucking like monkeys, we actually had dinner together and talked... and then fucked like monkeys. While the fucking like monkeys part was as enjoyable as ever, getting to know him better and getting more of a feel for his character revealed that... well... he really isn't terribly likeable. He's spoilt, manipulative, calculating, dishonest and, much as I hate to admit it after all of the sex we've had, kinda creepy.

Afterwards I gave him a lift home in my car, and I was driving he put his hand on my thigh and stroked my leg. It took all of my self-control not to bellow "GET YOUR FUCKING HAND OFF MY LEG, YOU HORRIBLE MAN!" I knew at that point I'd be very happy never to see him again.

So when he texted me a couple of weeks later seeking to hook up, I twisted the truth slightly to say that I'd started seeing someone and didn't feel right about fooling around. 

Besides the whole creepiness thing, my other big problem with UAM was that he's married. Before you start declaring me a home-wrecking slut, you should know that it's a sham marriage. His wife is a lesbian who has a girlfriend back in their home country. He married her to take the heat off both of them from the religious police, and also so that he could come out to Australia on her student visa as she studies at a local college. They sleep in the same bed, for appearance's sake as neither of them are out to their local ethnic community, but they've never consummated their marriage as far as I can tell.

So I'm let off the hook, at least a little bit. Even so... the fact that he's married always made me very uncomfortable. It reinforced the immorality of the whole thing. It's easy to spin a sexual relationship with a single gay man in ways that can be said to conform to traditional morality, but to me banging a married man is beyond the pale, making a mockery of the sacred institution on virtually every level. His marriage means nothing to him, nothing to her, and apparently not enough to me.