In the aftermath, potential.

So Mr Singular has broken his silence.

After he'd ignored my texts and emails for a week, I decided that I didn't want to end this on such a sad, vituperative note, so I sent him an email on Monday morning basically stating that I was sorry for hurting him, I hoped he would eventually forgive me, and wishing him well. I imagined him and his fag fag* snickering to themselves at my old-fashioned preciousness and the fact that it took me so long to realise I was dumped, but I felt I had to do it, if only for the sake of closure.

Half an hour later, I noticed an email in my inbox. From Mr Singular. Great, I thought, it will be some scorn thinly disguised as acknowledgement.

But it wasn't. It was a sad admission that he was suffering under a mound of guilt and inability to move on, and hating himself for not being able to forgive me. He said I deserved better, but he hoped we could still be friends.

I replied in a noncomittal fashion. He replied to that. I replied again. By the time we'd both left work we were discussing the issues, albeit obliquely. He texted me later in the evening, and, after several exchanges, he admitted that he'd forced himself to forgive me, and asked for my forgiveness in return, which I gave.

And I thought, "Dammit, you total bastard! What are you doing? And why are you doing it now?"

Because something odd had happened. I think he broke me. It's as if I'm suddenly a slightly different person. Once the awful realisation that he was rejecting me sank in, about a week ago, I'd decided to get my life back on track. I went back online and chatted to some guys whom I'd been keeping at arm's length because of my relatonship Mr Singular. Now that that was over, by Monday night I had set up dates with three new guys.

And the thing is I don't want to cancel. They are all interesting in their own way. More problematically, they are all sexually interesting in their own way. As things stand at the moment it's pretty much guaranteed that I'll fuck at least two of them.

Guy One is a government manager based in a regional city, who is only up in my big city sporadically. He wants a proper relationship but hasn't been able to find anyone who fits the bill, so as a second choice he's interested in a long-term, committed, respectful fuckbuddy relationship. Basically he wants to find someone he can stay with, and fuck, when he's in the city. He's fit, intelligent, not unattractive, hung, and apparently has the sex drive of a herd of wild stallions. I've enjoyed our online chats, so I'd be interested to meet him, at least.

Guy Two is a stockbroker who appears to have brushed aside my insistence that I'm not into casual sex, but in a friendly, direct, no-nonsense way that I find perversely attractive. He's fit, nice looking, and very masculine. His attitude - "Of course we'll have sex. It'll be fun. Quit your bitching" - is refreshing because it's so unsleazy. I spoke to him on the phone last night and discovered that we have a surprising number of things in common, so it will be interesting to actually meet him.

An odd additional aspect is that Guy One, Guy Two and I all have the same first name. When I realised this I jokingly thought, "Man, three guys with the same name... we should totally have a threeway." And suddenly the idea seemed irresistibly hot. It's too early to suggest it - hell, I don't even know if I really want it - but it's lodged itself in my brain and is just sitting there, waiting.

Guy Three is a nurse, and does not have the same name (which is good, because I don't think I could handle a fourway), but he seems like a nice guy. He's sort of odd-looking, at least according to his profile photo, but the layout of a person's face is often the least important aspect of attraction. The fact that he's a nurse suggests a caring, compassionate nature, and after all the stress and heartache of Mr Singular I could really use that.

*a gay male version of a fag hag - a non-sexual, somewhat codependent gay best friend. Mr Singular spends a lot of time with his.