A lesson to be learned

I logged in under my old GMM profile yesterday afternoon to check some information held there, and almost immediately I was contacted by two random guys. I haven't even looked at it in weeks, and suddenly as soon as I open it two guys pounce. Go figure.

The first was a little on the old side and "bi-curious", which I generally take as GMM shorthand for "more trouble than he's worth". But I was bored so I sent him a return message.

Meanwhile I'd been winked by another, younger guy. His profile was somewhat listless and there was no photo, but I gave a mental shrug and sent him a positive message anyway.

Over a few exchanges the older guy sent me sentences unmarred by punctuation, seemingly thrown together at random in an idiosyncratic patois of English and SMS. He mentioned that he was drinking scotch and coke, and I had a mental image of him swaying in his chair, taking slugs from the bottle and banging it occasionally against the keyboard then hitting 'Send'. The conversation ended when I made I mild joke and he logged off.

Note to self: Don't make jokes to hammered older men who are scanning GMM for a root.

The younger guy and I sent a few short messages back and forth, then he gave me access to his photo file. Mild interest became more intense interest; he was really cute, in a Japanese tourist kind of way. We traded a few more messages and I sent him a slightly jokey photo of myself. And he logged off without a further word.

Note to self: Don't send jokey photos to cute Asian boys that might put them off.

So the lesson to be learned here, presumably, is that my sense of humour needs to be weighed down with a big rock and thrown off a bridge if I'm ever going to successfully chat up a guy.